Indonesia, Singapore urged to unite ASEAN for KP in Bonn climate talks

As the Bonn climate negotiations near its end, with more set-backs than progress, Indonesia is pressed to convince the Association of Southeast Asian Nations (ASEAN) towards a bloc support for the Kyoto Protocol. Early this week, ASEAN’s key dialogue partners Australia and Canada have become the latest Annex 1 countries to join Japan, Russia and the United States in shunning the second commitment period of the Kyoto Protocol, the world’s only legally binding agreement. Australia and Japan are members of ASEAN +6 and +3 respectively.

Individually, the ten members of ASEAN are supportive of the extension of the Kyoto Protocol whose first commitment period is about to end in 2012. However, ASEAN has yet to make a united stand, despite the region being one of the most vulnerable to climate change, whose impact could in turn, further exacerbate the region’s political challenges, chronic poverty, tensions and conflicts and community displacement.

“Now is the time for ASEAN members to set aside their political differences and speak as one in calling on developed countries, especially its dialogue partners to sign to a second commitment period under the Kyoto Protocol” asserted Shalimar Vitan of Oxfam Internal. Oxfam International is part of the ASEAN for a Fair Ambitious, Binding and Global Climate Deal (A-FAB) coalition of green groups in Southeast Asia.

In the last intersessional meeting in Bangkok, Thailand more than two months ago, ASEAN missed the opportunity to have common positions on key areas of adaptation, mitigation, technology transfer and financing despite its members’ common concerns and the meeting being held in an ASEAN country.

The current impasse in the negotiations pits developing countries, on the one hand and Annex 1 countries, on the other hand over the Kyoto Protocol. According to the United Nations Environment Program (UNEP), the GHG emissions reduction targets could only lead us to 4 degrees Celsius global temperature increase, instead of limiting it to 1.5 degrees Celsius, as science requires.

“The more than 600 million in Southeast Asia, particularly its majority living below poverty clearance would have the worst impacts of climate change unless worst emitters stick to the Kyoto Protocol and developed countries target an earlier GHG emissions peaking period,” said Atty. Zelda DT Soriano, political advisor of Greenpeace.

Aside from Indonesia, who chairs ASEAN this year, Singapore is likewise urged to be more cooperative. “Singapore must stop discouraging fellow ASEAN member states from having a common position in the negotiations,” added Soriano. Since 2009, it has been observed that the Singapore has been critical of proposals for joint statements by Indonesia, Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Vietnam.

Kulula Airlines

Kulula Airlines is a low-cost South-African airline that doesn't take itself too seriously.      Check out their new livery!  And read about their Customer Relations. WHAT A PITY KULULA DOESN'T FLY INTERNATIONALLY - WE SHOULD SUPPORT THEM IF ONLY FOR THEIR HUMOUR - SO TYPICALLY SOUTH AFRICAN. Kulula is an Airline with head office situated in Johannesburg, South Africa.  Kulula airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture" and announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported: On a Kulula flight, (there is no assigned seating, you just sit where you want) passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, "People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!"                   ---o0o--- On another flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."                   ----o0o--- Heard on a Kulula flight. "Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing.. If you can light 'em, you can smoke 'em."                   ---o0o---  On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings.  If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have; no children or spouses please."                   ----o0o--- "There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane."                   ---o0o--- From a Kulula employee: "Welcome aboard Kulula 271 to Port Elizabeth. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised."                   ---o0o--- "In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travelling with more than one small child, pick your favorite."                   ---o0o--- "Your seats cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."                   ---o0o--- An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying our airline.” He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?" "Why, no Ma'am," said the pilot. "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we land, or were we shot down?"                   ---o0o— Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of Kulula Airways."                   ---o0o—

West Philippine Sea

 

On the Peaceful Settlement of Disputes in the West Philippine Sea

Since 1935 all administrations have abided by a constitutional provision adopting the principles of international law for the settlement of international claims and disputes.

The Philippine Government has been clear and consistent with respect to its position on our national territory. The administration has always asserted that it will dismiss out of hand any claim to what are considered integral parts of Philippine territory, such as the Recto (Reed) bank in western Palawan. The administration has also always called for a peaceful, multilateral settlement with regard to contested claims in the West Philippine Sea, along the lines of the Declaration on the Conduct of Parties in the South China Sea and applicable international laws, notably the UNCLOS.

The administration calls on all parties concerned to refrain from making statements that would impede such a resolution.

Concerning our defense posture, the administration is determined to improve the capabilities of our military and Coast Guard to enable the effective patrol and protection of our national territory and Exclusive Economic Zone.

World's smallest man

Can I have a short please? Tiny teen enjoys his first beer as he becomes world's new smallest man

 10th June 2011

Junrey Balawing sips a beer nearly as big as him as he celebrates becoming the world's smallest man.

The 22-inch Filipino turns 18 on Sunday when Guinness World Records will award him the crown - which he takes from Nepal's 26.4-inch Khagendra Thapa Magar.

Mr Balawing said: 'I am so excited! I am small, but now I am a man.

'I have tried beer for the first time. I like it but can only have a little. I want a beautiful wife. 

'I know she will probably be taller than me. I can't wait for my party.'

Celebration: Junrey Balawing from the Philippines will be awarded the title of the world's smallest man on his 18th birthday this weekend

Meet the parents: Junrey Balawing with his mother and father, Reynaldo (L) and Concepcion in the Philippines.

His proud mother Concepcion, 35, and 37-year-old father Reynaldo, from a tiny village near the town of Zamboanga del Norte, have been invited to a reception with the local mayor.

Mrs Balawing said: 'We've been told the people from Guinness need to measure Junrey three times in one day to confirm his height. Only then can he be named the smallest man in the world.

'It's very exciting because we are a poor family and things like this have never happened before.

'I can't believe Junrey is going to be famous all over the world and people are flying from countries like Britain and America to see him.'

The young man is the same size as a one-year-old and loves to ride on top of his father's shoulders or be carried by his mother.

Tiny teen: Junrey is so small most of his 18th birthday presents are bigger than he is.

His family said he stopped growing after his first birthday and has remained the same size ever since.

His mother said she first noticed something was wrong as Junrey approached the age of two but no doctor was able to help.

She said: 'He was always sick and we noticed he wasn't growing so we took him to see a doctor but they were baffled.'

When Junrey was 12 the family took him back to the doctor but the only advice they received was to give him vitamins, which the family couldn't afford.

Too tall: Nepalese man Khagendra Thapa Magar, at 26.4 inches, is now only the world's second smallest man

Other doctors in the capital Manila refused to treat Junrey for less than 100,000 pesos (£1,500) - more than a lifetime's wage for Reynaldo, who works as a blacksmith in a nearby town.

He said: 'I am only home at weekends because I have to work so much to feed the family. 

'But even if I worked every day for the rest of my life I couldn't afford the expensive doctors in Manila.'

He didn't even realise his son was set to be a record breaker until contacted by Guinness.

He said: 'I was picked up by police one time then brought to the mayor's office. 

'The mayor told me that on Junrey's birthday there will be an important visitor who will come and I should bring Junrey with me.

'It was only then I realised Junrey was about to become famous far beyond our little village.

'There's going to be a big party for Junrey in the town attended by lots of important people.'

Junrey's younger but siblings Jaycel, 13, Jay-art, 11, and Jeanritch, six, who are all tall, go to school while their older brother stays at home with his mother.

Concepcion said: 'I would love to be able to work while my other children are at school but I can't leave Junrey. He needs my care every minute of every day.

'Junrey can only walk with some help and he can't stand for too long because he's in too much pain.

'But he loves it when I tell him he's the smallest man in the world - he is beaming with pride.'

Size matters: The world's tallest man, Bao Xishun, who stands 7.9 feet, shakes hands with He Ping Ping - who died last year - the smallest man in the world at 28.8 inches prior to Mr Magar

Courtesy: daily mail reporter

Manny Pacquiao's Resort shutdown

Pacman Resort’ closed down

by Stanley Palisada, ABS-CBN News

June 12, 2011

AKLAN, Philippines - The local government of Malay ordered the closure of West Cove Hotel in Sitio Diniwid, Barangay Yapak, Boracay Island for violating the National Building Code of the Philippines.

West Cove Hotel, also informally referred to as “Pacman Resort” is owned by Crisostomo Aquino, People’s Champ Manny Pacquiao’s close friend.

The local government of Malay questioned West Cove Hotel’s “off-shore” development and the erection of concrete structures on the coves and rocks, which supposedly imperil the fragile ecosystem in the resort island.

West Cove Hotel, operated by West Cove Management Philippines Incorporated (WCMPI), allegedly violated Section 301 of the National Building Code of the Philippines, which states that “no person, firm or corporation, including any agency or instrumentality of the government shall erect, construct, alter, repair, move, convert or demolish any building or structure or cause the same to be done without first obtaining a building permit.”

No local permits too

The closure order was also based on Executive Order No. 010 series of 2011 signed by Malay Mayor John Yap who also ordered the immediate demolition of the illegal structures.

“There have already been notices sent to the management of West Cove Hotel na pinapasara sila because of certain violations,” said Rugen Aguirre, chairman of the Committee on Laws and Ordinances.

West Cove Hotel allegedly began operations in 2009 without a building permit and license to operate.

“Wala silang building permit, wala silang occupancy permit and they have continuously operated for the past two years,” Aguirre said.

For its part, WCMPI said it had continuously tried to comply with the requirements of the National Building Code, but the local government of Malay allegedly rejected their application.

Criminal charges

The Philippine National Police and the Boracay Special Tourist Police have been tasked to implement the immediate closure of West Cove Hotel, direct all persons to vacate the property and bar persons from entering the area.

The municipal engineer was also ordered to remove and destroy all illegal structures.

Building officials will also file charges against WCMPI for violating Presidential Decree 1096 or Adopting a National Building Code in the Philippines.

Government’s blessings?

West Cove Hotel management insists its operation is legal and that it had the blessings of the Department of Environment and Natural Resources (DENR).

Then under the leadership of DENR Secretary Lito Atienza, WCMPI claims it had been granted a 25-year Forest Land Agreement for Tourism Purposes or FLAgT by the DENR.

But according to Boracay Foundation Incorporated President Loubelle Cann, the illegal structures have grave effects on the environment. The government has to do what it can to stop these practices even if it will affect business, Cann said.

“Kami sa business community, we are very happy and we support the action na ginawa,” said Cann.

“Malaking bagay yun sa amin kasi naman dapat pareho tayong may negosyo, dapat naman patas lang.” Cann added. - with reports from Nony Basco, ABS CBN Iloilo

Baby Suri Cruise

Move over Imelda Marcos: How Suri Cruise, five, already has a $150,000 shoe collection

The fashion-conscious daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes is even said to have custom-made designs from Marc Jacobs and Christian Louboutin...

She has always displayed a strong sartorial instinct, and has been wearing heels since the age of three. Now, it appears that in just a few short years Suri Cruise has acquired quite the shoe collection.

The five-year-old daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes has $150,000 worth of footwear in her closet, according to news reports published today.

And you'd be unlikely to spot any Stride-Rite among the young fashionista's array, as sources claim she already has a taste for high-end labels such as Christian Louboutin and Marc Jacobs.

 

Suri Cruise, pictured in $110 Ugg boots (left) in March and purple satin heels (right) later that day, has a shoe collection believed to be worth over $150,000

They say Ms Holmes, 32, has even been getting her favourite designers to custom-make shoes for Suri, to accommodate her little one's penchant for heels.

A source told Star magazine: 'Suri has so many designer shoes. 

'She’s a massive fan of Marc Jacobs and she’s had several shoes custom-made, so if they didn’t come with a heel, Katie had them redesigned for Suri. She commissioned a pair of Louboutins for her a while back!'

They added that Suri is insistent in her fashion choices, turning to tears if she doesn't get her way.

Sartorial instincts: Suri is regularly seen in heels, despite her tender age, and her mother is even believed to have commissioned bespoke pairs for the five-year-old from her favourite designer labels

'The older she gets, the less she wants to wear anything but little heels,' she source continued. 

'Even when she’s going to play dates or walking on the beach, she cries if Katie reaches for anything but a little pair of sandals with some sort of heel.'

'If they don't come with a heel, Katie has them redesigned for Suri. She commissioned a pair of Louboutins for her a while back!'

But the pre-kindergartener's A-list parents believe that her precocious fashion sense is something to be nurtured, and even let her choose their own clothes.

The insider added: 'Suri sometimes picks out the shoes her mum should wear, and then picks out shoes for her dad! They genuinely seem to value her opinion and want her to make her own decisions.'

It is an approach to parenting believed to be in accordance with the doctrine of the Church of Scientology - she is apparently treated as an adult, free to make decisions on her clothes, make-up and diet.

Flat out: Despite her precocious penchant for heels, Suri also has an impressive array of ballerina flats, including designs by Marc Jacobs (left), and is almost never seen in the same pair twice

But $150,000 on shoes is small fry compared with the rest of the youngster's wardrobe, which is believed to have a value of $3.2million.

She has been spotted out in a $2,140 Dolce & Gabbana trench coat, and last year she was spotted with an $800 miniature version of her mother's Ferragamo bag.

Last month Suri even came 21st in a list of Glamour magazine readers' style icons, beating Lady Gaga and Sarah Jessica Parker in ranking.

by Tamara Abraham, Daily mail online

June 7, 2011

Orchard Road

This is my second time to dine at Orchard Road Cuisine. This resto is located at SM Megamall, Mandaluyong City, Philippines. Orchard Road Resto was named after the famous road in Singapore well-known for its entertainment, food hub and retail establishments. It is also one of the major attractions of the city state of SG.

  After checking the list of menu, we ordered 1 Black Pepper Chicken and Rice for Php145.00 only

  Another order, Sweet and Sour Fish with rice  for

 Php 175.00 only

 Sweet and Sour Pork with rice for  Php 150.00 only

 We also tried the CHAR KWAY TEOW, a stir fry noodle.This is very tasteful and healthy. 

Char Kway Teow is very affordable with Php 150.00 and good for 3 pax servings.

CHAR KWAY TEOW

 ICED PEACH TEA and ICE CALAMANSI both

 Php 45.00

 ORCHARD's version of PORK Siew Mai (3pcs) for 

P75.00 only

 Orchard Road is a Singaporean-inspired restaurant. It offers a very tasteful menu influenced by Chinese, Malay and Western cuisine.

 What I really like about Orchard is the transparency of its kitchen. You will be entertained by their chefs and kitchen staffs wherein the food preparation is being watched by the diners.

Food is freshly cooked in a showcase kitchen

 I also commend the interior of this resto due to its very elegant touch of colors 

By the way, Orchard Road now offers delivery services. Just dial 2121212 for more details.

You may also want to check their official site at http://www.orchardroad.com.ph

For details:

Orchard Road Restaurant

2F Bridgeway, SM Megamall

Phone# 212-1212

World's smallest man

Guinness may declare Pinoy as world's smallest man abs-cbnNEWS.com 06/11/2011  ZAMBOANGA DEL NORTE, Philippines (UPDATED) - Guinness World Records may declare on Sunday a Zamboanga del Norte resident as the world's smallest man. Junrey Balawing of Zamboanga del Norte From his looks and his height, it's easy to mistake Junrey Balawig for an infant. But on June 12, Junrey - the eldest of 4 siblings - is turning 18 years old. His family held a simple celebration for him before his trip to a health center in Sindangan to meet with officials of Guinness World Records. Junrey is a contender for the world's smallest man. "Masaya ako na si Junrey ang pinakamaliit na tao sa buong mundo. Proud kami na makikilala sa buong mundo ang anak namin," said his mother, Concepcion. Guinness officials weighed and measured Junrey but declined to release the figures just yet.    Khagendra Thapa Magar of Nepal He is believed to be 23 inches tall, smaller than the current world's shortest man - Khagendra Thapa Magar of Nepal - who stands 26.4 inches. If the claims are true, Balawing will not only be the shortest living man, but the shortest living man in history, a statement from the Guinness World Records said on Saturday. Junrey will again be measured on Sunday, this time in public. By the time he turns 18, Junrey may be declared as the world's smallest man by the Guinness, a feat his family and the country is waiting for. - Reports from Ryan Chua, ABS-CBN News; Dynah Diestro, ABS-CBN Zamboanga; ANC; Reuters

Places in North Korea

Paranoia, no cars and silence in the cities: What I saw when I played golf in the most secretive and dangerous country on earth

Drizzle swept across the fairway and a bitter wind ripped leaves from the trees as I stepped onto the first tee of one of the world's most exclusive golf courses.
The setting might have been a British links in typical British weather, except that in the UK I would not be watched by two minders waiting to call me back should I stray too far looking for a lost ball.
There would be no sudden boom of a heavy gun from a military base near the course - and no peasants bent double in the surrounding fields digging over acres of brown mud with hoes, or oxen pulling wooden ploughs across the arid landscape.

Richard Shears with North Korean caddy Miss Nim on the Pyongyang golf course in the first ever tournament to be played in the secretive country on earth

For I was competing in an extraordinary golf tournament in North Korea - an event which proved to be my ticket into what is probably the most secretive - and dangerous - country on earth.
Few Western writers have ever gained access, but during five days touring the country I was able to witness something of how life is lived in a nation about which we know so little.

 

I don't suppose most of the workers in the fields surrounding the Pyongyang Golf Club have even heard of the game. In fact, it's hard to believe courses have been built at all in a land which for the most part exists under a centuries-old feudal system. But then foreign diplomats and the political elite do need some form of entertainment.
We even heard a story that Kim Jong Il, the North Korean leader, scored a series of 11 holes-in-one after the course opened.

One of the main streets in the North Korean capital, Pyongyang. There are relatively few vehicles in the country and most streets are just like this, virtually devoid of traffic

Though the upper echelons of the ruling Korean Workers' Party may enjoy the perks that come with power, the vast majority of the 22 million population live under an iron fist of totalitarian control.
It is the world's most militarised nation, with nearly ten million active and reserve personnel, while its continuing aggression towards South Korea - strenuously denied by the North, which says it is the South which is to blame -famously led George W Bush to describe it as an outpost of tyranny.
Before I arrived, I'd read news stories of mass starvation, of people living in misery under a brutally strict regime and of prison camps where inmates would rather die than suffer years of unbearable hardship.

A boy hurries along a street, typically empty of cars, in Pyongyang, where bicycles and walking are the main means of getting about

So what would I see for myself?
I was one of 18 players from around the Western world granted a visa to play in the tournament arranged by British Lupine Travel agent Dylan Harris.
Most unexpectedly, although we were all domiciled in a hotel on a river island in the centre of the capital Pyongyang - a city of around 3.3 million people - with a soldier guarding a bridge to the 'mainland', we were were given an intimate insight into daily life in a country that allows only 2,000 visitors to pass through its borders every year.
We swung our clubs near 'Dear Leader' Kim Jong Il's extremely private lakeside villa and we were taken to the demilitarised zone (DMZ), where we were able to wave across rolls of barbed wire to an astonished group of American servicemen a few hundred yards away in South Korea.

A rare image: Girl cadets learning how to march in Pyongyang

Amnesty International has claimed that prison camps in North Korea have been expanding as more political dissidents are arrested, but I had no hope of verifying this, having been warned beforehand that asking any kind of political questions could provoke serious consequences for our minders, who, as the days went by, proved to be a jovial group.
Nevertheless, the level of control - you might call it paranoia - was extreme.
I was forced to leave my laptop, mobile phone and camera zoom lenses in China, presumably because the authorities were worried I might provide information to any dissidents in North Korea - or show the populace pictures of lavish western lifestyles.
Everywhere we went, we were monitored carefully by our three minders - Mr Oh, Mr Han and Miss Ann - who ate with us and travelled with us, never letting us out of their sight, even on the golf course.

Close to the demilitarised zone in North Korea, a soldier turns to read an inscription on a monument marking the death of Great Leader Kim Il Sung, praised for taking the country out of the ruins of the Korean War

They had joined us on the train from the border town of Siniuju, where I had my first glimpse of life inside this secret country.
Smartly-dressed men and women rode on bicycles side by side along the wide boulevards, their briefcases or shopping bags sitting in small baskets. A few military vehicles passed them by, but most striking of all was the almost complete absence of cars, which are incredibly rare across the country.
With no car horns and no roar even of motorbikes, this was a silent city.
Yet while I was transfixed by these scenes, reminiscent of a China long before the motor car clogged its roads, the cyclists who found me and my fellow golfers equal subjects of fascination.
An ancient green and white diesel which creaked along at 40mph on the 200-mile carried us on the six-hour journey to the capital Pyongyang, clinging precariously to an unstable track that cut through a parched brown landscape, broken at times by groups of workers scurrying about like figures in a Bruegel painting and an occasional toy-like red and blue tractor.

A North Korean military officer stares at South Korea across the demarkation line inside the demilitarised zone (DMZ) between the two bitter nations. The line is immediately in front of the blue buildings on the side closest to the officer's position

Stopping at a station, we were allowed to step down onto the platform - 'but you will take no pictures, it is forbidden', we were told, the first order of many in that vein which were to follow. As we stretched out legs, squads of soldiers with backpacks scurried around, while a female voice singing patriotic songs was amplified through overhead speakers.
As we continued our journey, I saw numerous large statues of Kim Il Sung, known simply as the Great Leader, his hand held out in a gesture of embrace. He it was who founded the country in 1948, and ruled until his death in 1994. Now, his son Kim Jong Il is the master of the nation. The cult-like worship of both figures is one of the most marked features of everyday life.
We reached the Yanggakdo Hotel in Pyongyang at night, but it stood out among the surrounding and darkened tall buildings of the capital, for it rose up to 47 floors and it seemed there was a light on in every room.

North Koreans clamber onto an already overcrowded bus - one of the few forms of transport in Pyongyang

Opened in 1995, it is located on an island in the middle of the Taedong river, a waterway dividing the city.
The foyer is cavernous, very much a throw-back from a Soviet era despite its relatively modern opening, but what surprised me was its concession towards Western expectations - a revolving restaurant on the 47th floor - while in the basement there was a bar, a bowling alley, a pool room and a table tennis room.
In my room, I could watch the BBC world service on a Japanese TV set before heading downstairs to drink a beer or two at around £1 a bottle, and eat Chinese-style food, with rice being served last because it's regarded as a 'filler', with the good meats and fish should be enjoyed first.
Once, we were afforded a fascinating snapshot of everyday life when we rode on the underground Metro from a yawning, brightly-lit station named Prosperity to another called Glory. The trains were packed with office workers crowded in together, the men in suits, the women smartly dressed in jackets and trousers which gave the impression they were not struggling for survival.
Even here, the silence of the city was striking, with wide boulevards cutting between skyscraper buildings. I could count the number of cars at any given time on my fingers, the main mode of road transport being trolleybuses, trams and bicycles.

Taken secretly from a bus, this picture shows a typical street in Pyongyang with public housing in the background. North Koreans are given flats free once married, but have to pay 3 per cent of their income for power and water

It was in the capital that I really came to understand the obsessive reverence that must be paid to the nation's leader. If you suggested to any sane Briton that he or she treat David Cameron the same way they would laugh in your face.
One day, I was led into a vast 'villa of reverence', where a lifelike figure of the Great Leader - straight from Madame Tussauds, it seemed - stood in a garden of plastic flowers.
Wearing woollen covers over my shoes, I was ordered to stand in line in front of the grey-suited figure, and at a command I bowed my head as soft music played in the background. If my hosts hadn't clearly been taking the ritual so deadly seriously, it was have been all too easy to laugh out loud.
At Mount Myohyang - the so-called Mysterious Fragrant Mountain 100 miles north east of the capital - were more amazing sights for here the people come to revel in the patriotic artefacts kept within a vast exhibition hall. Here, as was the case in Pyongyang, everyone wore pin badges showing the portrait of the now-deceased Great Leader Kim Il Sung.

Another picture taken secretly from a bus, this image shows children working in a field south of Pyongyang

The economy is largely based on agriculture

We were invited to inspect gifts that had been given by world leaders to Kim - father and son - displayed in scores of glass cases.
There was a stuffed baby crocodile perched upright holding a tray of wooden goblets from Nicaragua, a painting from Cambodia portraying a broom sweeping U.S. troops out of Asia, bears' heads from the former Soviet Union and Romania, and even a plaque portraying an image of London Bridge from a group calling itself the Britain-Korea Friendship Committee.
One of the great myths to emerge from North Korea has centred around Kim Jong Il's supposed private train, which is said to have its own station and its own track leading into Beijing, the Chinese capital, which he's visited in the past to receive medical treatment and has recently returned to drop in on the Chinese hierarchy.
The reality is that in the exhibition hall there are two special carriages - one presented by the Chinese leader Mao Tse Tung, another by Stalin - but they have not been used since 1978. Kim Jong Il does have a special train to travel on these days, but it is nothing like the bullet-proof version I was shown.

Pictured from Dandong, China, these North Koreans stare across the Yalu River separating the two countries. Many stand for hours looking at the Chinese city that is for most beyond reach - so near yet so far

As we travelled around, our ears were filled with propaganda - or as Mr Oh and Mr Han insisted, the truth - about the United States.
Bookshops in hotels are filled with English language publications about the hated U.S., with one title describing America as the Empire of Terrorism.
We were driven south to the demilitarised zone where we stared across the demarkation line towards South Korea - a couple of hundred yards away - where, by coincidence a group of American servicemen stood.
They had been brought to the 'dividing line' from Seoul presumably to stare across to the north at starving peasants and aggressive North Korean soldiers.
Instead they saw my grinning group of Western golfers waving happily at them. They did not wave back. Neither did a South Korean soldier - picked for his intimidating height - in his green uniform, glaring instead at our cheek.

Photo taken from a boat in the middle of the Yalu River between China and North Korea shows two North Korean men sharing a joke on the riverside wharf. It is the closest they will get to China - and the world beyond

As if to reiterate the North Korean authorities' intense antipathy towards America, I was taken aboard the U.S. 'spy ship' Pueblo, which was captured in 1968 and is now moored on the Taedong River in Pyongyang. While the Americans said at the time that it was in international waters, the North Koreans insisted it had strayed into their territory. I was even shown a black and white newsreel describing how it was overwhelmed by the Korean navy.
While the itinerary that had been planned for us was clearly intended to show off the strength of North Korea as a military power, I was more interested to know about the more mundane aspects of life.
I asked, too, if there was any truth in reports some time ago about an assassination attempt on Kim Jong Il. But any mention of it to our minders proved fruitless as they made it quite clear that any discussion about Dear Leader was off limits.
When I asked Miss Ann to tell me about how families exist, she surprisingly tucked her arm in mine as we walked to our bus and told me that once people are married - an arranged affair by parents - they are given free accommodation in a flat. All health care is free, too, and while Korean traditional medicine was is alongside Western treatments, it is the Korean treatments that were the most successful in preventing diseases.

A North Korean woman in traditional dress walks through a garden north of Pyongyang

The economy is largely based on agriculture. Farmers grow vegetables and rice, there are chickens, goats, pigs and sheep to eat, and it was suggested to me that talk of thousands of people starving to death during times of famine was an illusion manufactured by the West.
As for a nuclear threat from North Korea, that was just a fabrication of Western imperialists.

All three minders emphasised that everyone in Korea is happy - and happily devoted to the Dear Leader.
I certainly found the people to be friendly, if perhaps a little shy at first. I witnessed workers in the fields laughing together as they toiled. Maybe it is a dangerous assumption to make that someone who has little must be unhappy - especially if they have never known any other existence.
When the day came for the golf tournament, fortified by a breakfast of pickled cabbage and sauteed pork, we set out in groups for the first tee. There, we were amazed to find we'd been provided with a number of attractive young Korean women dressed in formal blue and white uniforms who would serve as our caddies.
The fairways were like light rough and extremely narrow. By the end of the day, I had been left way down the field - in spite of the attempts by my caddy, Miss Nim, to suggest in her very limited English what club I should use on each hole.
And as I missed each easy putt, she smiled sweetly and clapped politely.

A Buddhist monk peers out from a preserved temple north of Pyongyang

On the way back to the hotel, Miss Ann decided it was time to sing us all a song. Standing at the front of our coach with microphone in hand, she treated us to a softly sung Korean song, while Mr Han, bizarrely, gave us a rendering of Eidelweiss.
It was a curiously touching gesture, and evidence - to my mind at least - that the natural bonds of humanity will often supersede the most implacable political divide.
When it was time to leave for China, Mr Han, Mr Ho and Miss Ann shook my hand and expressed the wish that we all return again next year.
Perhaps we will. And if we and others like us continue to do so, perhaps the barriers erected so many years ago will finally begin to crumble.
I left North Korea with mixed feelings. Perhaps, in towns and villages beyond the distant hills, there is abject poverty.
Yet one Western businessman who has dealings with North Korea pointed out that the pleasures we in the West enjoy - our TVs, our cars and so on - are not craved by North Koreans because they've never had them.
As for the story of Kim Jong Il's 11 holes-in-one, a few discreet inquiries among officials at the golf club revealed that it was nothing more than an urban myth. Not that any of them would dare to say so in public.

Richard Shears strikes a blow for the West on the Pyongyang Club course in North Korea

By RICHARD SHEARS  in Pyongyang, North Korea